Today I felt like I
needed to write a blog that has nothing to do with reading or drinking. True,
last night’s episode of Glee may have been a bit predictable; after all with a
show about teen angst it’s only a matter of time before the all too real issue
of teen suicide comes up, but I think it’s important to address just the same.
Teen suicide has been on
the rise and whether it’s from more bullying or social media being so prevalent
in today’s society or simply the fact that kids just don’t know how to deal
with their emotions anymore, it’s still a huge concern. I’ve even heard it said
that kids are committing suicide simply for the drama of it; because of social
media being the way that it is suicide videos are now also viral videos, it’s
entirely possible that some kids, in rare cases, take their own lives because
they feel like it’s the only way to get their message out and be heard. I honestly don’t even know how to respond to
these statements, although sometimes I’m afraid they may be true. Death is a
powerful message and I know from personal experience that it can sometimes be
used as a weapon to try to make the focus of their pain feel pain in return, to
feel bad for what they have done.
As adults in this world
we have a responsibility, not only to teach our children that it is not tolerable to bully others, but also
that taking your own life is never an option. It’s paramount that children know
growing up that someone understands
them, that there is love and understanding despite the hate that they may feel
from others, that there will always be arms to hold them and words to back them
up and, most importantly, that there will always be a safe haven. Even if these
children don’t feel love from their parents or from children at school, they
need to know that there are people out there who love them no matter who or
what they are.
The best way I can think
of for this to happen is for everyone
to lead by example and practice tolerance and understanding. Hate is a worldwide
issue and it is a powerful one. Hate isn’t just words thrown around at the gay
kid or the chubby girl in the halls, it isn’t just lowering your head as you
pass a person of another race as they walk by, or yelling racial slurs at a
driver that makes you angry. Hate spurs wars and breeds from generation to
generation and it’s time for it to stop across the board. True, we can’t stop
others from hating us, but we have to stop hating them back. It’s so easy to
get angry at being misunderstood and hate them for their hateful words, but it
only makes us as bad as they are. I’m not saying to grab your local bully and
give them a big squeezey hug, but realize that the hate they feel has most
likely been breed into them or instilled in them from infancy. That’s why it’s
so important for us to teach our
children not to hate. We have to watch our mouths every moment, because even if we don’t always mean what we say,
even if it just comes up in anger, if our children hear us say something
hateful they will remember it and they will repeat it. And since we can’t
change the world and we can’t make people
love us or respect us, and our programs are only as strong as the people they
reach, we have to teach our children that not everyone is going to like them,
and that the world can be cruel, but the world can also be a great place and an
understanding one. We have to teach them that there is always someone else who
is going through the same thing. Get the word out any way that we can to just
hold on.
Sometimes I feel so
hopeless, like there’s no way for me to change the future of this world. How
can I change the world my son will grow up in if I can’t even get those closest
to him to realize their own hateful beliefs, or their own close-mindedness? But
I look into my sons eyes and I know I have to try.
I sometimes feel
responsible for the death of a friend of mine. He wasn’t bullied into killing
himself but I think he didn’t see any other way out, and he was angry and
depressed and if I hadn’t ever stopped talking to him, if I hadn’t played petty
games that destroyed our friendship I could have been the person he called to
talk him out of killing himself. The truth is that someone in his life should
have known, and someone, anyone, should have stepped up sooner and recognized
that he was unstable and needed help long before the situation that took his
life ever happened. We need to all take this outlook on life. Even if you don’t
know someone very well, if you see them hurting or suspect that they may be
drowning, take the time to reach out to them. Let them know that you are there
for them. Let random people every single day know that you are there for them.
Smile at the people as they pass you on the street, even if they think you’re
completely insane for being a beaming smiling idiot, smile at them anyway
because on a day when they are feeling super depressed that one smile may just
make the slightest bit of difference.
So that was my soap box,
I hope you can find it inside yourselves to displace even the smallest amount
of hate from your hearts, because it does make a difference.
3 comments:
Well said Cait. I felt exactly the way you did after watching last night's episode. I said the same thing on twitter (and hashtagged #glee) to make my point. Not all that are bullied are gay, yes it is happening to them but it is happening to others. We need to stop bullying for ALL.
There was a line in the show that I would like to point out when the teachers were gathered disucssing what happened and notifying the school body. The point that Mr Shuester made was "who is responsible for stepping up and taking notice of the signs of suicide?" I think the answer is all of us. All of us that know the person suffering. As you said if we stop the hate that we put out we can make a difference, even if to just one person. Suicide is not the answer, no matter how bad it is, there is someone that will miss you. That part of their point was made well, someone WILL NOT want you to die. We should all be somebody to someone.
What an amazing post, Cait. Well thought out and well written. Great job!
Well said, Cait! Love it.
Rebecca
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