The first How To book I
ever read was a How To have better sex book. The first chapter was about “getting
to know your vagina”. I was a little surprised by this because, after all, I’ve
lived with my vagina my whole life: I thought we were pretty well acquainted. I
was wrong. The book said to get a mirror and look at my girl. I put the book
down and never picked it back up. I was pretty sure that a book talking about masturbation
and an up close and personal with my Lower Lady was NOT going to help me
rediscover my libido. In fact I was quite sure that if I looked at her in the
mirror I would realize exactly why I
wasn’t feeling like having sex: because Lady Friend is not such a good looker
and any doubts about why we were not
on speaking terms would be summed up into one word if I looked at her: ugly. It was shortly after this that I realized the
problem wasn’t with me at all. I was just dating a D-bag. That set me and My
Girl back to rights. Funny how she knew before I did that the relationship was
a dud.
The second How To book
was about knitting, and it was more of an idiots guide than an actual How To. Knitting
is not such a complicated thing, really, once you’ve figured it out a bit. I
wanted to be a better knitter and knit more complicated things so I ordered the
book for my Kindle. The words describing the knitting, even the knitting things
I already knew how to do, made no sense to me what so ever. Even the pictures
had my brain spinning. I needed and idiots guide to the idiots guide!
Now I do How To Videos: they
are free on YouTube and you can rewind them and I even feel better about
shouting at my computer screen and a real person as opposed to the written word
on the page when the videos make no sense to me. I wouldn’t suggest looking up
How To Videos on how to have better sex though. Just a suggestion.
6 comments:
Agreed. I've never found an actually helpful "How To" book. I think a lot of adults prefer to learn by live example, video, or through actual instruction of some kind versus reading a manual on stuff.
Although, I am not sure if I'd prefer to learn about my lady bits via live example...
well, I hope that the video about getting to know your vagina isn't on youtube...but otherwise, youtube has kind of become the unofficial tutorial center for everything from driving, to using a netty pot
lol! No thankfully the lady bits is not on youtube (as far as I know)!
I totally forgot to mention that I think What to Expect is concidered a sort of "How To" book and I HATE that book! Scared me to death. I stopped reading that after the second chapter.
First let me say..bwahahahahahaha!!! Oh my. I remember when you and I were having this conversation on twitter. Bravo for the post! I totally agree with you on help books, give me a live demo. Except again on the Lady Bits, that's called porn. haha. I never read "What to Expect" since I had a couple friends to tell me live what to expect, they did all the scaring. haha.
The Mayo Clinic pregnancy guide is SO MUCH BETTER than What to Expect!!
What a hoot you are! I thought this post was too funny. Someday you will have to tell me who the D-Bag was.
Yeah, I'm not in to self help books either. I have bought many and finished only one which I read too late to help me with problems at work.
A. Susan
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